Journal of My Mind

Heaven Knows – Rick Price

My friends

keep telling me
That if you really love him,
You’ve gotta set him free
And if he returns in time
I’ll know he’s mine

But tell me, where do I start
‘Coz it’s breakin’ my heart
Don’t wanna let him go

Why I live in despair
‘Coz wide awake or dreamin’,
I know he’s never there
And all the time I act so brave,
I’m shakin’ inside
Why does it hurt me so?

Climb – Miley Cyrus

I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there’s a voice inside my head saying
“You’ll never reach it”

The struggles I’m facing
The chances I’m taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I’m not breaking

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

‘Cause there’s always gonna be another mountain
I’m always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose

So Close – Jon McLaughlin

How could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We’re so close
To reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close
So close
And still so far

Officially Missing You – Tamia

I thought that from this heartache
I could escape
But I fronted long enough to know
There ain’t no way
And today
I’m officially missing you

Now I don’t even know you at all
I don’t know you at all
Well I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it’s safe to say baby safe to say
That I’m officially missing you

Well I thought I could just get over you baby
But I see that’s something I just can’t do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can’t find a way
To let go of you

First Love – Nikka Costa

Don’t go out and play
I just dream all day
They don’t know what’s wrong with me
And I’m too shy to say

My first love
He thinks that I’m too young
He doesn’t even know
Wish that I could tell him what I’m feeling
’cause I’m feeling my first love

The Call – Regina Spektor

It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word

Just because everything’s changing
Doesn’t mean it’s never been this way before
All you can do is try to know who your friends are
As you head off to the war

 Maybe I’ll post another one if I find more interesting lyrics. But for me, these lyrics reflecting me for now. Especially the first song. Hahaha. Okay then, sorry I did not post something that even more interesting than this. I’m kinda tired today so maybe I want to take a rest first =)

Thanks for reading my post this time! Bye bye and see ya’!

Hi, blogger! Wew, it’s been about 10 days I didn’t post anything here. Lately, finally I realized that I bored with my routines. I did exactly the same things everyday. I need something new. So, for days I’m looking for a new activities. Well, as you have guessed, now I have new activities

1. Making/Editing Video

               

       I’ve signed up to Youtube since January 2009, but I haven’t posted anything at all. So, yesterday I decided to post my videos. And now I realize that posting videos on Youtube is fun! I don’t know why. I want to post more videos to my channel. And.. recently, I like to make videos. I am inspired with other girls in worldwide that they can make awesome videos at my age! I want to start making short movie. Maybe I can start with silent movie. Seems cool for me. Meanwhile, I make some documentary movie about my activities or my events =)

    I thought editing videos is a difficult thing because you have to master the program first. But after I learn by doing (editing my school project last month), it doesn’t seem too difficult anymore. I don’t say that I’ve mastered it. But, well, now I can understand how it works and I can make a simple video =) I am gonna learn more about how to get some special effects. You can see my videos (and those videos mostly editted by me) on Youtube.

2. Mix ‘n Match Clothes

   

    I never took fashion too seriously. I never took much time in front of my closet everyday to decide what outfit should I wear that day. Usually, I’ll just wear my back jeans, old t-shirt, sandals and bag. That’s all. I do read magazines, but I always bored when all those magazine show the same things. Same patterns, same trends. What fashion items that in and out.
   
    But, recently, I go to www.teenvogue.com, and realized that fashion is something. I mean, fashion (style) without following trends (because in here, most of the girls following trends and seeing them together in the mall with uniformly outfit always make me sick) is cool. Teens in the another countries have cool and different style which is awesome.
   
    They say that fashion is like our identity. I know, wearing t-shirt and jeans is the best. But, I want to try wearing something different like skirts or dress =) (I won’t try something too extreem for me). So, yesterday I went to my closet and found sooo many old clothes. It looks like that I haven’t bought new clothes recently. In the weekend, I went to stores and bought 2 new dresses. I’m going to my best friend’s birthday next Saturday anyway.
   
    I like to browsing street style and I like them. Different style and now I can pick my own style. Which style is best fit to me. And my brother’s GF has a good style. I learnt a bit from her how to mix and match with our own style.

3. Aikido

         

    “Why did you choose Aikido?”
    My friend asked me once and honestly I answered, “I don’t know,”
    I don’t really know what made me choose Aikido in the first place. I used to join Jujitsu when I was in 5th grade. And since then, I want to learn martial arts. It seems fun, knowing a lot of techniques and can defend myself. I am not a tomboy girl. But I like learning martial arts. Isn’t it kinda weird? =p
   
    I know, Aikido is not something new for me. I’ve learnt it for a year. But, still, all those new techniques are new for me. Aikido is not a martial art that focuse on punching and kicking. But how to gain the energy to throw them away from us. It is an art involving some throws and joint lock. Honestly, when I joined Aikido for the first time, I don’t really know what Aikido is. In my mind that time is I want to learn this new martial art!

    And I’m glad I did. Eventhough my sensei (my teacher) something could be very strict, but now I found out that learning Aikido is like learning arts. If you can learn the tecniques carefully, you can see it as a beautiful tecnique. The movement is calm but full of strength. And now I realize that I love learning Aikido. I know I am still waay a beginner, but I want to learn more and more so I can be an Aikidoka.

4. Blogging

    I don’t know since when but I like blogging recently. I mean, since 5 months ago. It’s fun sharing my though to everybody who read my posts. Well, then I’ll keep posting and posting, sharing my thoughts to all of you!

And then.. Hmm, well I think this post is quite a long post and full of pictures =)

I think I’m gonna post a lot of new posts with more pictures. I feel my blog seems quite boring recently =p

Okay, I think I gotta go. Thanks for reading my post! =)
Bye bye and see ya’!

I was shocked yesterday when I didn’t see my pet (Imeh and Ipeh) at home. I looked after them to entire home but didn’t find them. But then, at night, my mom told me that she already ‘moved’ them from house. And I was sad. Really. Because, she didn’t tell me from the beginning.

And then this morning, my mother woke me up and brought Boy (my other cat with black fur). After that, she fed Boy. I woke up and watched Boy eating his morning meal, then I watched TV for a while. My school began at 10 am, and that was still 7.20 am. My mom started to get Boy showered, because he’s dirty (he played outside the house a lot). I can saw Boy trying to escape from my mom and went downstairs to dried her body in the morning sun, like usual.

Well, I decided to turn on the computer and chat with my brother on Yahoo Messenger. Suddenly, a bad news arrive. My maid said that Boy died because accidentally he crashed into cars or something! I don’t wanna believe it. Boy, my cat, that I just saw 10 minutes earlier has died? I ran off to downstairs and went to the road. And she was right.

I saw Boy’s dead body covered by blood. I can’t say anything but crying. He always there for 2 years. He has been a cute cat, waiting me home. I’m sorry I’ve been busy lately, Boy, I should have played with you more often. Was I being a good owner, Boy? That time, when I ran as fast as I can, I hope it wasn’t you. I hoped they mistaken another cat as you. But, there was no mistake. It was you and it broke my heart. When I came back from school, I hope you were still there, lying on the floor in front of the stairs, waiting me. But, today, you weren’t there.

Boy, thanks for being my cat this 2 years. Thanks for waiting me get home every afternoon. Remember things we’ve been through? You made me sleep at 3 am, once. I’ll always remember your cute meow. I’ll miss you, Boy, you know that. Thank you. I don’t think I want to have a pet for awhile. For me, Boy is the best pet I’ve ever had.

And today I messed up with my math quiz so bad. I don’t know if I could pass or not. Gotta study harder for Biology test that will coming up tomorrow. Oh yeah, I think I should reschedule my schedule. The schedule for AS Level Physics May/June 2009 has arrived. I have to study or I’ll disappoint my parents again for wasting about Rp.1,600,000 (around USD 160) and get a unsatisfying grade.

Bye bye, everyone. See ya’!